(Bored Games) Buntective

Honey placed the game board in the center of the table, grinning out at the other occupants; Harlowe, Raider, and Bea. “I’ve got a game!” he announced, unfolding the board to reveal a setting inside of a manor’s interior, fit with a section of differently labeled rooms, such as the hall, garden, dining room, kitchen, party room, playroom, blackjack room, library, and bedroom, with a grid-like layout forming the spaces of hallways between each room. In the center was the name of the game, ‘Buntective’.

It was one of his favorite games to play on a rainy day, and he absolutely loved it, though it was also one of the only board games he had, so there wasn’t much room for competition. His boyfriend Harlowe was on a winning streak for four games in a row, and Honey was always cheered up by seeing Harlowe win at something he was good at. It was part of the reason he loved it so much; Harlowe always got so excited whenever it got pulled out.

It was also the only board game they had that Harlowe had actually lost at before, so there was that too. They hadn’t had such luck with Bunny Land, Bunopoly, Imp Trap, Codebuns, or even just plain poker.

“Ooh, my favorite! Murder mystery!” Harlowe reached out towards the box that Honey had set to the side, reaching in for the little pamphlet of rules inside and pushing up his glasses as he huddled over to the table, his eyes wide with excitement. “Where is he… I know he’s in there somewhere…”

Inside the box, there were a series of differently colored buns in various outfits, two sets of cards held in rubber bands, an envelope, some grid sheets, a few pencils, and a set of dice. Then, in a little baggie on the side, there were a set of items; a mochi hammer, trowel, watering can, silverware, drink pick, and garden shears.

“Got him! I call dibs on Professor Bourbun!” Harlowe said, holding up a light, glasses-wearing purple figurine with a wide smile and placing him on the board, very clearly more than eager to start the game.

“Why do you always get to have Professor Bourbun?” Raider asked, to which Harlowe held the little figurine a bit closer to himself. “That’s the lucky piece! You’ve won with Professor Bourbun like five times now! We’ve got a whole scoreboard, you have five, Honey has two, Bea has one, and I haven’t won a single round since we first started playing. C’mon, trade for once, won’t you? Doctor Drabsinthe, maybe? He’s green—you like green, it’s your favorite color!”

“I don’t really know why I pick him—he has glasses, I guess? And purple’s a nice color,” Harlowe reasoned with a shrug. “He’s a professor. It makes me feel a little smarter when I play as his piece. Plus I’m the boyfriend, so I get dibs.” He glanced towards Honey with a mixture of expectancy and nervousness. “Right?”

Honey’s smile softened, and he reached for a yellow figurine fit with a set of wings. “Yep! House rules. I’ll take Colonel Sherry!” He took the box from Harlowe and held it out towards Bea, giving it an inviting little shake, causing the dice and remaining figures to rattle around inside. “Bea?”

Bea considered for a moment before plucking a pink figurine from the box. “Miss Hopscotch,” he said, then picked up the box to hand it to Raider. “You like to be Sergeant Moonshine, right?” he asked, offering him a smile as he held up the blue figurine fit with a set of goggles. “Here!”

“Foiled again,” Raider murmured, taking the figure from Bea into his hands. He moved the box across the table back to Honey, who took out the dice and set them aside on the board before thumbing through the cards and separating them into three piles—the suspects, weapons, and rooms, and placing the box back onto the floor.

“Sweet! Everyone remembers how to play, right?” Honey asked, and watched as the group began to place their figurines on the starting spots around the board with matching colors. He himself scattered the baggie of weapons around each of the rooms, then shuffled the three separate piles of cards he’d made and slid the top card from each pile into the Buntective envelope off to the side. “Now give me one sec to shuffle these up, and I’ll pass them out! We’ll go clockwise, alright?”

Honey began to deal the remaining cards out between himself, Bea, Raider, and then Harlowe, and passed out the Buntective sheets, where everyone began to write out their initials at the top of the ‘Who’ section. The Buntective sheets had three grid sections, being the ‘Who’ with the suspects, the ‘What’ with the weapons, and ‘Where’ being the rooms across the board.

Looking at his own cards, Honey found he had the trowel, watering can, and the silverware, as well as the kitchen, which he began to cross out in the column beneath his name, as well as under everyone else’s names.

“I think I’ll let Bea go first, just to skip a roll-off,” Honey said, and held out the set of dice to Bea, who was in the middle of crossing out items on his own sheet that he’d hidden under the table. “Then maybe counterclockwise from there!”

Bea took the dice into his hand, anxiously gnawing at his lip before shaking them around and letting them fall across the board, giving him an even seven, and he moved his piece along the squares of the board, a smile lighting up his face as his piece had enough spaces to enter the party room. “Ooh, nice! Er… one second.”

He paused to consult his list for a moment, then peeked back out at the board. “I suggest… it was Sergeant Moonshine with the mochi hammer in the party room!” he announced, taking Honey’s piece and the watering can and placing them into the bedroom room before glancing to his left to Honey. “Cough up the cards!”

“None here,” Honey said, shaking his head. “Go fish.” He glanced towards Harlow. “How about you?”

“Nope,” Harlowe said, crossing off a few marks on his sheet. “Raider?”

Raider pulled out his hand of cards, shuffling through them briefly before wincing and showing one of his cards to Bea.

Honey perked up as Bea proceeded to mark off another part of his sheet, and looked to his own. If Raider had shown a card, it meant that he had either the card for Sergeant Moonshine, the mochi hammer, or the party room. He carefully circled the corresponding cards in the column beneath Raider’s name on his sheet and hummed. “Your turn, Honey!”

Honey took the dice from Bea, giving them a light little shake before holding them out to Harlowe, his smile widening. “A blow for good luck?” he asked, to which Harlowe’s eyes widened, and his boyfriend eagerly leaned forward to blow on the dice before sitting back, his tail flicking eagerly to and fro. Honey tittered, then cast the dice onto the board, giving him a four. “Aww… it’ll be lucky next time for sure!”

He moved his piece into the party room with Bea’s and gnawed at his lip. “Well… let’s see…” He tapped his lower lip with his pencil’s eraser. “I suggest it was Colonel Sherry with the garden shears in the party room,” he said, and moved the garden shears into the room.

Harlowe shook his head. “None here!”

“Aw, for real?” Raider groaned and passed a card to Honey, who lifted it up to see that it was the card for the party room before handing it back to Raider and marking off the party room from his Buntective sheet. “Damn… only my cards so far.”

“We might see someone else’s this time!” Harlowe encouraged, picking up the dice and giving them a shake before pausing and holding them out to Honey with a sheepish grin.

“Roll good for him! Boyfriend privileges, go!” Honey blew on the dice, squinting at them expectantly.

The resulting lucky, boyfriend blessed roll… was a three.

Harlowe laughed, shrugging amiably. “Guess I’m headed to the party room too!” he said. “I suggest Miss Hopscotch with the drink pick in the party room!” He moved Bea’s piece into the party room, along with the drink pick.

Raider slumped, thumping his head on the table and passing Harlowe a card before taking the dice from the board himself. “C’mon, dice, give me a twelve. Redemption time,” he murmured, shaking them about and blowing on them before casting them out across the board to receive an eight. “Hell yeah, good enough! See, this is why I gamble at claw machines, it’s all in the luck dudes.”

Bea snickered, giving him a little nudge. “It’s not so bad either way,” he eased. “It’s a fifty-fifty shot, Raider! You either roll good, or you don’t.”

“Oh, ha-ha. Luck is a skill, Bea, not a science,” Raider replied with a harmless eye-roll before grinning and nudging him back. He moved his character into the library, then tilted his head. “I suggest it was Miss Hopscotch with the silverware in the library,” he announced, dragging Bea’s piece and the silverware into the library, to which Bea shook his head.

Honey pouted a little, passing the silverware card to Raider before taking it back. “Boo,” he grumbled. “How dare you.”

“My turn again!” Bea took the dice back, and rolled a nine. “I think I’m going to sit here in the library… um…” He consulted his sheet once more. “I suggest it was Sergeant Moonshine with the watering can in the library!”

“Aw, what? Again?” Honey passed Bea the watering can card, then took the dice. “C’mon… give me a good one! Harley?” He held out the dice, letting Harlowe blow again. “Eight!” Honey cheered, patting Harlowe’s hand. “Thanks! I think I’ll move a few to the… playroom! Switch it up a bit… I suggest that it was Sergeant Moonshine with the mochi hammer in the playroom!”

“Go fish,” Harlowe said.

“Shit,” Raider mumbled, and passed yet another card to Honey, which was the mochi hammer.

That leaves the drink pick and the garden shears, Honey thought, crossing out another weapon from his sheet. All of the suspects were still open, as well as all the rooms except the party room and kitchen. It wasn’t looking wonderful so far, but at least he had most weapons cleared off!

Harlowe scooped up the dice and rolled, getting a six. He moved to the blackjack room and hummed to himself. “I suggest it was Miss Hopscotch with the drink pick in the blackjack room!”

“Yay!” Raider threw up his arms. “Not my card for once! Finally!”

“Aww it’s one of mine though,” Bea said, handing a card to Harlowe.

Curious, Honey circled the drink pick and the blackjack room under Bea’s column. He knew from former turns that Bea couldn’t have Miss Hopscotch, which left those open.

Raider collected the dice, scattering them across the board, and rolled a four. “I’ll go to the blackjack room too! I suggest it was… Colonel Sherry with the drink pick in the blackjack room!”

Bea made a face, sliding Raider a card and taking the dice, rolling a six. “I’ll head back to the party room from the first turn,” he said, moving his piece before sitting back. “I suggest… Miss Hopscotch with the drink pick in the party room!”

Once again, Raider passed a card, and Honey paused.

So far, no one had gotten the drink pick or Miss Hopscotch as far as he knew, but he did know that Raider had the card for the party room. Honey tentatively placed a checkmark and a question mark by the drink pick and Miss Hopscotch, and took the dice from Bea. Since Bea had handed cards for both guesses in the blackjack room, but didn’t have Miss Hopscotch from an earlier turn, which meant that he probably had the blackjack room, and he safely crossed it off his list.

“Hmm…” Honey cast out the dice, rolling a nine. “I’ll head to the library,” he said, counting the nine spaces and moving his piece into the library. “I think I’ll suggest… Professor Bourbun with the drink pick in the library!”

“Got one,” Harlowe said, passing Honey the card for Professor Bourbun.

Honey frowned a little. He’d sort of hoped that the guessing would have gone around the full table so he could be sure of his preemptive guess of no one having the card for the drink pick, but had no such luck. He passed the dice to Harlowe, who he noticed was looking a bit more eager.

“Ooh, an eleven!” Harlowe slid his piece to the library as well, pushing it next to Colonel Sherry and offering Honey a cheeky smile before pulling up his sheet. “I suggest it was… hmm… Miss Hopscotch with the drink pick in the library?”

No one passed Harlowe a card, and he frowned, glancing back at his sheet. “Wait, I was sure someone would have the drink pick, because I had the… oh.” He paused in realization, much to Raider’s elation.

“I’d like to make an accusation!” Raider nearly shouted, jumping fully to his feet and jabbing a finger at Bea. “I accuse Miss Hopscotch with the drink pick in the library! Gimme that envelope!” He practically dove to the middle of the board for the envelope of the three cards from the beginning of the game, snatching it up and pulling the three cards free before holding them up triumphantly.

True to his by all means lucky guess, in the envelope were the cards for Miss Hopscotch, the drink pick, and the library.

“Woo!” Raider cried, throwing his arms up into the air. “I did it! I did it! I finally won! Finally! Me!”

Honey snickered, hiding his laughter politely behind a hand. “Ohh boy, there he goes,” he tittered, then scooted closer to Harlowe and wrapped his arms around him, lifting him up into his arms and nuzzling his nose. “It’s okay, Harley, you’re my winner,” he whispered conspiratorially, to which Harlowe promptly gave a bashful little squeak and stuffed his head into the fur of his ears to hide his face.

“Who’s the lucky piece now, Bourbun? Woo!” Raider beamed. “Who wants to go again?!”