Blind Date

 Dates are certainly not outside of Beau’s wheelhouse, but she has never had one so thoroughly prepared for her. It is more like her to iron out the details herself, too fussy to relinquish control to some sniveling bun who might not even know a dessert fork from a butter knife. Yet, after much reassurance on Oleander’s part, Beau offered herself up for a blind date with the promise that the restaurant would offer something even to her tastes. “And perhaps the bun too, if the night goes well,” Oleander had said with a wry smile.

This is how she finds herself rushing into the restaurant last minute, dress fluttering and heels clacking against marble. It is better to make a memorable appearance than to be timely, after all. She only hopes that the bun Oleander has set her up with is reputable, charming, and well-worth her extremely valuable time.

It is only after the waitress has led Beau  to their reserved table that she discovers that this bun is none of those things. Half-dozing, the ends of her hair floating in the bowl of vegetable soup at her elbow, the bun calmly lifts her head to offer Beau a sleepy smile. 

Beau stands at the edge of the table, lips turned downward in a pout and arms crossed, refusing to take her seat until she has been properly acknowledged.

“Shan’t you be waiting for me with a bit more… enthusiasm?”

--

Colette had a master plan. She didn’t go on blind dates very often, or really any dates at all. She’d slept through her alarm for the last one, and the one before that she got distracted and forgot to show up at all. But this date was going to be different. Oleander had assured her that he had a perfect match, and a perfect match sounded nice. So this time, she was prepared. She got there thirty minutes early and ordered a quick little soup snack so that she would have something to do until her date arrived.

It was going to be perfect. Or, at least, she’d thought it would be, but now she’s blinking away to a very cross, very beautiful woman standing across from her. This is just her luck! And even after she’d tried not to muck it up!

Colette blinks her eyes blearily and smiles up at the other bun. She stifles a yawn, then delicately fishes her hair out of her soup and pats it dry as best she can with a napkin. “I was making sure that the soup was good enough. It’s pretty alright, although I’m worried they may have drugged it. I never fall asleep, honest!”

She yawns into the back of her hand as discreetly as she can. “I’m super enthused. Just still a little sleepy… I’m Colette. And you are?”

–

Well, it was very chivalrous of Colette to test the soup for her, especially if there was even the slightest chance that it had been drugged. Shouldn’t this place have a more competent staff? And after all of Oleander’s promises too! She would simply have to give him a piece of her mind if she left the restaurant with any more dissatisfactions. 

“I suppose that was kind of you,” Beau responds with only the smallest huff of indignation. She still had some right to feel inconvenienced, didn’t she? If the poor girl had enough forethought to order them some drinks, then perhaps she wouldn’t be dazed and dripping with soup. Why, it seems to Beau that she herself is the only one that ever thinks of proper date etiquette.

With much hesitancy (and grace, of course), Beau lowers herself into the chair across from Colette and offers her an extended hand. Not so much a handshake as an invitation for a chaste kiss atop her gloved hand.

“Charmed. I’m Beau, and I do hope you remember my name once this is all said and done.” 

She signals the waitress for a round of drinks before folding her hands into her lap daintily and giving Colette her full attention.

“Tell me, Colette. What is it that entices you?” Beau gives Colette a small smile, challenging. “Looks? Brains? Oh, perhaps a sense of humor?”

– 

Colette nods. It was very kind of her to risk poisoning to protect her date. Even at the cost of her hair. Maybe especially at the cost of her hair? These sort of gestures tend to mean more if one gives something up, after all.

“Thank you,” Colette says, very primly. Beau seems like she would appreciate that kind of thing; she seems maybe a little stuck up. Colette wonders the weirdest place she’s ever fallen asleep unexpectedly; it’s probably nowhere near as exciting as anywhere she’s fallen asleep.

Beau sits and extends a hand and after a moment of confused uncertainty, Colette reaches out and presses a gentle kiss to the back of it. Her hair swings forward, and she winces as the chunk of wet soup hair hits Beau’s arm. “I’m so sorry about that,” she says after she leans back, a little embarrassed.

What entices her? What an odd way of speaking; however is she supposed to have the correct answer for that all queued up? “I suppose I like people who will show me new things. I like to learn, even if I do tend to overextend myself a little.” She’s collapsed from exhaustions in many, many places in Burrowgatory, despite her best intentions. 

Beau orders them drinks and someone takes Colette’s half-eaten soup, leaving her sipping a fancy beverage that she can’t decide if she likes or not. “What about you? Are you enticed by anything?”

–

Beau would have mentally congratulated Colette for her, albeit slow, understanding had she not ruined it so quickly. With a wrinkle of her nose, Beau removes a handkerchief from her purse to clean the soup off of her glove as best as she could. Oh, now this is just dreadful! All of this work to make herself presentable for this date and now here Colette’s gone and spoiled it; she can’t imagine such a stain will come out without some real elbow grease.

Beau can only hope that Colette’s made such an error out of nervousness or jealousy. Perhaps she’s too faint in the presence of a beautiful woman, or maybe Colette has ruined her outfit so that she has Beau all to herself? After all, no suitor would look her way when she’s sporting a tarnished outfit. Yes, that must be it. Colette must be dreadfully enamored with her; oh, how sweet!

“Is that so? I can’t say that that’s a bad answer at all, though you musn’t always rely on others to expand your horizons.” Beau nods her head sagely at her own advice, feeling particularly generous in the moment. She does owe the girl for all of her obvious attempts at getting her attention, doesn’t she? 

“I like someone that challenges me,” Beau responds after a thoughtful sip of her cocktail. She twirls the little umbrella between her fingers before pointing it in Colette’s direction with a smile. “Do you think you’re up for that, Miss Colette?”

–

Colette is just so sleepy is the thing. She’s so tired, and so worn out, and she’s been at this restaurant for so long. The alcohol is making her head a little fuzzy, and she’s so warm. She could just close her eyes for a second, couldn’t she?

Colette nods sleepily in response to Beau’s question, although she isn’t really sure what she’s supposed to say. “I think I can. I always seem to end up in the most unusual places. That’s challenging, right?”

She’s pretty sure that she’s killing this date. Beau seems engaged, and is definitely flirting, and Colette is very sleepy but somehow still awake. Sure, it kind of seems like Beau is doing most of the talking for the both of them, but Colette doesn’t really have a lot to say right now. She’s still thinking about her hair, and how the restaurant will be kind of mad at her if they find out she accused them of poisoning their vegetable soup. 

Speaking of talking, Beau turns around to say something to the waiter, and Colette relaxes in her seat for just a moment, resting her chin on her palm and closing her eyes.

By the time Beau turns back to Colette, she’s already fast asleep again.