Sermons and Sins 3

Delight was a regular at the Church of Sulfur, and had been since its founding or her return to Burrowgatory - she didn’t really remember which had been first anymore.  It had been a long time, regardless, and such petty details didn’t really matter to her anymore.

She enjoyed attending the sermons, discussing with the clergy, and of course, getting very friendly with the clergy.  It was only natural for a Lust bun to want such things, after all, and the clergy quite approved of indulgences of every sort.

It was also a good place to come when she felt troubled and uncertain, as she did now.

“Delight, welcome back!”  Oleander’s voice was always a pleasure to hear, although she had anticipated he would be busy when she arrived, as he usually was.  It looked like he had been working on something, however, as he was seated in a pew with several notebooks.  “What can I do for you?”

Dee sat next to him with a quiet sigh.  “That’s…  A good question, I suppose,” she said.  “Am I interrupting something?”

Oleander laughed slightly, ducking his head and giving her a sidelong look.  “It’s nothing that can’t wait, darling,” he said, patting her hand.  “I was working on a sermon for this week, asked Mercy to review it, and they pointed out I’d done nearly the exact same one three years back, so I’m reviewing the sermons to try to come up with a different idea.”

“It must be difficult to come up with a new sermon each week for years on end.”

Oleander yawned slightly, leaning back into the pew and crossing a leg over the other.  “It is,” he said.  “I try to delegate to more junior priests or nuns once a month, usually, but it doesn’t always work out.  Some just don’t really have much talent with words, or sufficient understanding of the topics they want to cover.”  He sighed quietly.  “I try to cultivate the talents I do find, of course - but not everyone winds up staying, either, and illness happens at times too.”  He laughed slightly.  “Still, I can’t imagine it’s more difficult than what you do.  Coming up with ways to make every orgasm description sound unique is harder than just trying to not repeat sermon topics.”

Dee sighed softly at that.

“...are you having trouble with your writing?” Oleander asked, sitting upright again and uncrossing his legs.  He shifted to sit sideways, one leg off the ground, and take her hands up.  “Usually you become excited when we talk about it.”

“No- but… I…”  Delight bit her lip, then sighed deeply.  “I’m wondering if I want to do something new.”

Oleander looked surprised at the idea.

She supposed it was understandable.  She’d been a writer for decades now, and her popularity certainly hadn’t waned.  She’d felt surprised when she had first thought about it too, but the more she did…

“Do you have thoughts of something else you’d like to do?” he asked.

She shook her head silently.

“Have you been feeling fatigued lately, or like you have no ideas?” he asked.

Again, she shook her head.  “I’ve got two more books in different draft stages right now, and notes to form another three at least.”

“What’s got you thinking about doing something new, then?” Oleander asked, frowning.

“I…”  Delight sighed.  “I was doing a signing at a bookstore a few weeks ago and…”  She hung her head.  “I was browsing before it, and I had trouble finding any books besides my own.  I… guess the clerk I talked to didn’t recognize me, but she said…  ‘What’s the point in it for a writer, trying to compete with someone who publishes so frequently and for so long?’”

Oleander squeezed her hands, knowing more was coming.

“I… asked my publisher about it, too, and they said they tend to ignore new erotica writers because they have me.”  Her shoulders slumped.  “I love writing, but I don’t want to be the only one.  It’s not any fun if no one else is doing it, if I can’t even read something not from my own head…  What’s the point, if it’s only me?”

“I’m sorry your publisher and that book store are doing that.  It’s not your fault, though - you shouldn’t quit something you love due to the bad choices of others.” Oleander murmured.  He knew there were book stores that conducted themselves better - but that wasn’t really the point of the conversation.

“I am too,” Delight said.  “I just… don’t see any way to stop it, except to quit, and I don’t want to just… sit back and do nothing about it.”

“Could you try publishing on your own?”

“I don’t know how to go about setting up something like that,” Delight said, sighing.  “And I doubt I could get any of the existing ones to help me build a competitor.”

“That’s fair, I suppose,” Oleander said.  “But maybe it’s something you could learn about over time and have as a long term goal?  If it’s you in charge, you can make sure new writers get the opportunities, while still getting to write as you enjoy.”

“And in the meantime?”  Dee’s smile was sad.  “I like sex and parties as much as anyone, but you and I both know we’d find it unfulfilling if that was all we did in life.  I just… don’t know what else to do, and yet I can’t see myself continuing to write my books…”

“Well…”  Oleander considered his thoughts for how he could help her think through this problem.  His eyes landed on his sermon, and an idea clicked.  “Not all writing is for books.”

She followed his gaze to his sermons and laughed softly.  “I don’t think I could write a good sermon.”

“Not what I meant, dear, though I think you’d write a better sermon than you think.”  Oleander took one of his hands away to caress her cheek, leaning in to give her forehead a kiss.  “There’s other genres of story, of course, you know as much - but beyond that…  There’s also newspapers, magazines, blogs on the internet…  If you don’t feel you can continue writing books, it doesn’t mean you have to give up on writing.  Maybe it just means you try writing something new and see where it goes.”

Delight considered that, leaning slightly into his hand.  “That’s… true.  I guess…  Maybe I could try a blog?  That won’t restrict me to any one thing initially…  I’ve never developed skills in non-narrative writing, so it could… be a good way to try new things while I try to stop… monopolizing everything.”

“You can do it,” Oleander assured her.  “And even more than that, I think you can eventually make a better publishing house to make all the others feel foolish for the opportunities they’ve squandered.”

Delight leaned into Oleander, cuddling with him for a little bit, thinking while he returned to his work on the sermons.  Eventually, she turned to kiss his cheek and stood up.  “I think I’m going to try writing about what I do each day to start,” she said.  “Thank you for the talk, Oleander.”

“It’s always a pleasure to speak with you,” Oleander said, squeezing her hand.  With a wink, he added, “Stop by after the service this week, and I’ll make sure to give you some pleasure to match.”

Dee giggled, and leaned back down to kiss him.  “I look forward to that, darling, I’ll make sure to bring some of the toys you like, then.  See you soon~”

She left the Church in far better spirits than she had entered it, humming softly.  This, truly, was why she had gone to Oleander.  Dee had many friends in Burrowgatory, but Oleander, due to the amount of time he spent taking confessions and giving advice, tended to be better at thinking through problems than many of them, without getting upset about what she was thinking about.  A lot of her friends, she knew, would have told her she couldn’t even consider ceasing to publish books - not given her suggestions on what else she could do.

She would make certain to give a generous tithe this week.  She always did - but still.  An extra generous one.  She’d been dreading having to quit writing, so focused on her favorite form of writing as the only one that she hadn’t seen how she could continue.  It had been worth it.